Saturday 24 January 2015

HECTOR'S HOUSE: SCHOOLTIME SCANDALS - PART FIVE...



'HECTOR' HILL we called him - mainly due to his uncanny resemblance (in our eyes) to the dog in Hector's House.  Not just in appearance, but also in voice, unlikely as that may seem.  He was a decent bloke, a teacher at my secondary school, and a man with a conscience - as this latest illuminating episode in our 'Schooltime Scandals' series now illustrates.

Before each pupil sat a form, waiting to be filled in.  It asked us about our home life, details about our parents, etc., no doubt designed to determine whether we came from happy envornments or were victims of poverty or abuse, or some such misfortune.  "These forms are 100% confidential," we were advised, "and will be treated with the utmost respect and secrecy."

And so we applied ourselves to our task.  However, before too long, the sound of adult laughter made me turn around to find out the cause of such open merriment.  Mr. Hill and a female teacher (whose name is lost to the mists of time) were standing behind a girl named SHEILA CRAWFORD, reading what she was writing and laughing and commenting on it.

I stopped writing and put down my pen.  Noticing this, Mr. Hill asked if I was finished.  "No sir, but I'm not filling out any more.  You told us that these forms would be in the strictest confidence, but here you are, openly laughing at what someone is writing, and remarking aloud for all to hear.  I'm not prepared to supply any personal information, the confidential nature of which could be abused in a similar manner."  (Of course, it's unlikely that I expressed myself in quite such an assured and articulate a fashion, but that was the gist of my statement.)

Oh, but they needed the information - it was important.  It would help them build a personal profile of each pupil, assist them in their quest to aid any student who might have a difficult home life, etc., etc.  "I refuse to participate!" was my steadfast response.  "You openly laughed at what Sheila was writing, and remarked upon it in front of the rest of it.  That's a betrayal of confidence for a start."

(I should perhaps mention that this wasn't a case of me trying to be difficult on some perverse whim, simply for the sake of it.  It genuinely did bother me that I might inadvertently write something about my parents which could be a source of amusement among the teachers in their staff room, and I therefore wasn't about to 'play ball', no siree.  Familial loyalty held sway.)

No more was said, doubtless because the two teachers, in their embarrassment, wished to minimise their injudicious display, and I lost myself in idle thought until the bell rang and we shuffled off to our next lesson in the New Block.  About 15 minutes later, there came a knock at the classroom door.  A pupil entered, and politely informed the teacher that Mr. Hill requested my presence back over in the Old Block.

I duly trotted over to the class I had not long left, to find a contrite Mr. Hill waiting at the door, anxious to explain himself and, essentially, seek my forgiveness.  Yes, he had been wrong, it was a lapse in judgement, it wasn't a common occurrence, it would never happen again, would I please fill out my form.  However, my heart was like flint.  No, I wouldn't be filling out the form, nor any other form of a similar nature in the future.

Nothing was ever said again on the subject, but I must confess that I was inwardly impressed that Mr. Hill was prepared to reason with me, explain himself, treat me almost like an equal, rather than attempt to browbeat or bully me into submission.  (He was also smart enough to know that such an approach wouldn't have worked.)  Here was a man of honour, compassion, integrity - who realised he had made a mistake (trivial as it probably was) and was eager to redeem himself in the eyes of one lone pupil (no ocular pun intended).

So here's to Mr. Hill - to 'Hector' - a genuinely good man, and a teacher who cared - perhaps even too much.  Of him it can be truly said:  "He's a great, big, decent ol' Hector."

14 comments:

  1. I'm in admiration for the way you always stood up to authority, Kid - I wish I'd had your confidence. In the '80s I remember asking people of about my age if they remembered 'Hector's House' and nobody ever did - I began to think I'd imagined the whole thing !!

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  2. Shame faced confession time - I've got the DVD of Hector's House. Don't tell anybody. As for standing up to authority, I suppose I was a rebel without a CLUE, CJ.

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  3. Whereas the notion of answering a teacher back or refusing a punishment never occurred to me! - I wouldn't have DARED!
    Yes, I remember Hector and Miss Kiki the cat!
    Anyway, do you want another of my schooltime scandals? Oh, GO ON, THEN, being as you insist!
    " SCANDAL : GIVING THE SCHOOL A BAD NAME! "
    I have previously told you that I was a huge Beatles fan in the '60's. Well, my second favourite group in the early 60's had been Freddie and The Dreamers, so imagine my excitement when I heard that Freddie Garrity himself would be coming to our town to opena Tesco's around '66/7! I just HAD to go and see/meet him and get his autograph! The trouble is I had school that morning. But I just had to see him, so I didn't go in that day, instead I made my way to the town centre and waited for the shop to open, along with all the waiting female shoppers. Well, after the opening ceremony we were allowed to queue up for autographs and I didn't have an autograph book, so I produced one of my school exercise books and asked him to sign that. " I've played truant from school to come and see you!" I proudly boasted! " Ee, you'll be getting into trouble! " Freddie replied as he handed me back my book and a signed postcard of Freddie & the Dreamers.
    The next day I went to school armed with one of my excellent forgeries of my Mother's hand-writing - "To whom it may concern, John wasn't at school yesterday as I had diarea ...dihareea....diehorea....a bad stomach, signed, my mum."
    But, to my surprise, after assembly, the "Pig" ( the head) called my name out to report to his study! It turns out, amongst those other female shoppers was one of the master's wives, who had noticed my school blazer badge and goodness knows what lengths they must have gone to, in order to identify me? ( mug shots of all the absentees, perhaps?) "You have brought the reputation of this school into disrepute!" the Pig sneered, " Why did you do it, boy?"
    I simply shrugged my shoulders and said, "Because I wanted to see Freddie." And it was as simple as that, no malice intended.
    But Freddie was right, I did indeed get into trouble, as my terrible crime earnt me six of the best ( the first of many!)
    But a valuable lesson was learnt that day. - Whenever I would ever bunk off again I would ALWAYS take a change of clothes!
    Anyway, here's to Freddie, sadly no longer with us, but never forgotten by me. That 6 was worth it for meeting and talking to one of my idols!

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    Replies
    1. Two questions, JP. Do you still have his autograph? And, when can we expect to see a brand new blog called 'Down in the Pitts'? (Good title, eh?)

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    2. Yeah, I've still got it, but I can't remember where!
      And, that's a great title, but I prefer just to chip in here with my schooldays.
      I am a bloggEE, rather than a bloggER and I think I'll keep it that way.

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    3. Wouldn't you much rather have a larger audience 'though? It's only you and CJ who regularly read this blog. (Seems like it anyway.)

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    4. I don't do it for the glory, Kid!
      Anyway, fancy another? - ALL RIGHT, then, ( groan), one more and then I reallyMUST get on! Right?
      "SCHOOLDAYS SCANDAL : SCHOOLBOY BREAKS WINDOWS ENCOURAGED BY HIS OWN FATHER!"
      This one took place at home.
      As a small boy, one day my Dad said to me, " Son, I'm giving you this, it's all that remains of my childhood catapult an' it was a beltin' catapult, but it's all I've got left of me toys, an' I'm now givin' it to you, so look after it!" and he handed me a bare, gnarled, darkened with age Y-shaped piece of a tree branch, with grubby string bound around the handle.
      Now jump forward a few years and the latest craze in our village were these metal catapults you could get from the ironmonger's, which could fire marbles for MILES, because of the really strong rubber. But they were just a bit too pricey for me to buy, so I thought, " I know! I'll mek one me sen out a that un me faether gimme!" ( I don't know WHY I was talking like Kes, I lived in the Midlands! So I took some strong rubber from off an aeroplane-launching toy,made a slingshot & threaded the rubber through it and bound it tightly to the cut-out tips with strong thin string and it was made. But would it be any good? There's only one way to find out, so, armed with a bag of marbles, I climbed up on the bedroom window will, opened the window wide and let one fly!
      WOW! It went for MILES! It was just like a bullet! But what should I aim at? In the field behind our garden was a telegraph pole. But in the next field to the right, there was a pumping station with a glass skylight.
      No contest.
      And so I began showering the building with marbles! As it was so far away I couldn't actually see or here if I was hitting it or not, but it didn't matter, because in my head I WAS The Smasher!
      After a while, I was rudely interrupted by a very angry man in a boilersuit underneath me in the back garden. He was shaking both fists in the air and saying, "GRRR!" Red fumes were rising from his even redder face and steam was billowing out of his ears! He had a huge lump on the top of his head and his face was covered in scratches and crossed plasters. "What do you think you're doing?!" he yelled up at me and began pounding on the back door.
      "Get down here!" was yelled from below , so I went down to the back kitchen to face the music. "He's been smashing my windows with his catapult!" Mr. Angry was yelling at my parents, "What were you doing THAT for?" he yelled at me, whilst little birds and stars were circling the lump on his head.
      " I didn't know I was," I lied, "I was aiming at the telegraph pole."
      "Well, you're not a very good shot then!" he retorted, " You're not even supposed to HAVE a catapult, anyway! Where did you get it?" he demanded.
      "Me Dad gimme it." I answered.
      Then silence.
      My Dad had turned bright red and had this sickly grin. Swest was shooting out of his forehead.
      "Go and fetch it, I'm going to confiscate it!" Mr. Angry ordered, so I did as I was told. Then I was sent to my room, so I climbed the stairs, saying, " Bah!"
      As I closed my bedroom window, I could still see Mr. Angry down below, surrounded by these strange symbols -@#*%∆$#@!!
      I never knew exactly what did go on downstairs after that, but for the rest of that week my Dad had strangely taken to walking around with his trouser pockets turned inside-out!
      Anyway, I thought it best to stay in my room for the rest of that evening.
      The next day,I thought it best not to mention it.
      Nobody ever spoke about it ever again.
      Ever!
      It was for the best.

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    5. But now your shameful secret history as a vandal is revealed to the world. (Well, to CJ and me, at least.) I've got one of those metal catapults, JP - had it since I was a teenager. I think it was made by a company called Milbro. You really should do a blog - you'd enjoy it. You coud do it under an assumed name.

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    6. My shameful past was influenced by the characters in comics. I wanted life to be just like that! And quite often, as my arse could verify, it actually WAS!
      Nah, I'll pass on the blog.
      I enjoy it even more from my end!
      Anonymity isn't an issue.
      I prefer joining in.

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    7. And to think that there are some people who say that comics can't influence people, eh? You're living proof that they can.

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  4. Kid, I'm sure there are others who read this blog but they just don't comment (come on you other readers - comment !!! Or else we'll send John and Kid around with their catapults !!)

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    Replies
    1. I'm digging mine out right now, CJ. Are you ready, JP?

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    2. Too right, Col, Kid!
      SUPPORT THIS BLOG!!
      The 3 of us love reading your comments too!

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    3. Next stop - THE WORLD!

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